Friday, November 16, 2007

Erik had another ultrasound

Yesterday Erik had an ultrasound at Valley Medical. The one he had had at Stanford about a year and a half ago had revealed absolutely nothing. So I was on tenterhooks about this one. Would the technician coax heretofore unseen structures? Would there be new details? Most of all, would I be able to tell where the kidneys were? Would I see his inner being?

The technician was a personable lady. She introduced herself and went to work right away after I had placed Erik on the bed in the room with the ultrasound equipment. The technician put some goop on a tool that was attached to a computer and monitor. The triangular field all of a sudden showed structures that were clearly defined black, gray and white areas. I saw the bladder. I saw the megaureter. The technician's comments helped me identify all the organs. She told me where the spleen was, and low and behold there were the kidneys. The right one was enlarged. That meant he had hydronephrosis. At the end of the procedure she asked me if anyone had ever diagnosed what made him so small and so frail. I couldn't think of anything more intelligent to answer than "beats me!" And she repeated "beats me!" I said "Erik's megaureter hadn't been discovered until just few month ago. At that time the doctor thought that Erik had had this condition since birth. But I also had it on good authority that Erik's kidneys had been tested at least four time before, and no structural anomalies had been found." She appeared surprised when I said that but didn't respond. I think she didn't want to blurt out something unspeakable. What I would have said under the same circumstances would have been something like: "You mean to tell me that Erik has had this condition all his life, and no one has taken the time to look at him in detail?" He has had something all his life and not a cotton-pickin' soul has bothered to go to the bottom of it. "Not even the science of Erik's condition had lured a wayward doctor into Erik's path." I guess Erik is so hard to find out because there is no redemption in curing a "cripple."

I feel so sorry for all those people out there who haven't seen Erik's insides. His ultrasound let me, and it convinced me that there was something there, and his insides are just as handsome as anyone's insides. His eyes are as blue as can be, and he can beat a rhythm with his hands.


Blogger Laurel said...

Beautiful birget. I feel your soul when you write.... that is not often for me.

12:28 AM  

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